Does marriage change your life? Real couples reveal all
10 Jul 2017
It's the question that all couples get asked once they've wed, but does marriage really change your life? These real couples reveal all
Image: Tom Pumford/ Unsplash
When the cake has been eaten, the decorations packed away and the planning has finally been put to bed, the reality of married life will start to sink in. But does a change to your title really change your life?
Here, we revisit some of our real wedding couples who answer the question honestly and their answers might surprise you.
Sian and Tom Morris
"In terms of marriage changing our lives, we still have our little disagreements but whereas before I would cry or worry he would leave me, now nothing seems as big. We already lived together and had pets so we were very much entwined, but with marriage it's that extra security that I know a fight about the dishes won't end our relationship. Sometimes we will look at each other and we are in shock that we are husband and wife because it seems so surreal. It also changes how people see you when you are out and about. When going out for the day and you refer to your partner as your husband you do get different conversations and questions compared to when I would say 'my boyfriend'. Everyone assumes you are more grown up... even though we are only a few months older and everyone asks when you will start a family."
Jessica and Thomas Bennett
"Like most modern-day couples, marriage hasn’t really changed our lives. We still live together in the same house we did before, sharing the same meals and watching the same TV shows. But every so often, when we’re holding hands and catch each other’s wedding bands, or when we get a letter addressed to Mr and Mrs, we have a moment. We catch each other’s eyes and smile, and in that smile we are reliving our perfect day and saying (sometimes out loud): “I’m so happy we’re married". Marriage has changed how other people treat us as a couple, though. Not people we know, but strangers. Hotel receptionists, bank tellers, waiters and people you meet at functions or events seem to take you a bit more seriously as a married couple. All of a sudden, everyone knows how deeply you feel for each other and respects the commitment you have made. It feels grown up."
Stacey and David Hinder
"Has marriage changed our lives? Ultimately, no... marriage does not change your life from day to day, but it is different in an amazing way. The feeling of being a family unit, the warm buzz you get when you get a glimpse of yours or your husband's wedding ring, or give your new name to someone, those little reminders make it all worthwhile. I never wanted to get married but it is the best decision I have ever made and I feel more secure than ever."
Rachel and Cameron McKinnon
"My husband and I had been together for five and a half years before we got married so there wasn't much we didnt know about each other at that point. Did getting marriage change our lives? Not really.
It was something we had always wanted though and nothing quite compares to the excitement of knowing you are finally husband and wife; it's a feeling hard to explain but it just brings a level of comfort, certainty and security to your relationship that you didnt realise was there before. We are so excited to start our life adventures together as our own family unit, hopefully one day with children. For now, we are enjoying the lovely, shiny happiness that comes from referring to each other as husband and wife, both in the knowledge that whatever life throws at us we are in it together."
Becca and Ollie Seyfried
"Getting married has definitely changed life for us. We were already best friends, having been together for 13 years and living together for six. Since saying our vows in July 2016, though, we’ve been even closer. We talk, laugh and cuddle more. We’re also closer in the literal sense as our wedding kick-started a new business for us. We renovated a barn on Ollie’s family farm in Somerset for our wedding reception and now run a successful wedding venue business, hiring The Barn at Cott Farm for other people’s special days. We now work together every day running our new business. Helping to plan other people’s weddings is not how we imagined our first year of married life, but it’s been great fun. Plus I’m not sure the novelty of calling each other husband and wife will ever wear off."
Katy and Matthew Capper
"I was never somebody who subscribed to any spiritual or religious significance to marriage. To us, like most people these days, marriage is a legal process between two people who are agreeing to share legal and financial responsibilities 'until death do us part'. Matthew and I had decided long before we got married that we would love, cherish and care for one another for the remainder of our lives... our wedding day just cemented this commitment. You should not expect a marriage to make your relationship stronger or more passionate; marriage will not change your partner to make them more loving or make them more mature. Saying your vows does not profoundly change your relationship; the values that you are looking for in your marriage should already be present in your relationship long before you make the decision to become husband and wife."